SEPT 14, 2018: The "Relationship Talk"

 Let's talk about healthy relationships

 The signs of a manipulative relationship.

   By yours truly, Karla. 

        Just recently, I decided to withdraw myself from the fast-paced social media platforms.

        Usually, I delete the social media applications from my phone and force myself for the first day to not redownload them. From day one and so forth, I adjust well and focus on other tasks that are required for a class.

        The sudden disappearance from the social media accounts helps ground myself and remember the simplicity of life. Also, it's great for mental health since everything online is fast-paced and there social standards of beauty and character that can be overwhelming. 

      An assignment that I had for my advanced multimedia course this past week required me to use Instagram. I had to monitor a few journalists Instagram pages and evaluate them to see their following interaction on their daily posts.

       As I was scrolling through the Instagram feed on Thursday night, Amber Rose appeared. She posted three images that reflected on three ways a person can be manipulated in a relationship: 

          I've gained an admiration for her this past year because of her openness with sexuality and confidence as I saw these posts. It validated the reason for my admiration towards her. 

       This conversation of healthy and non-healthy relationships is usually dismissed. We are not talking about the deeper damage that can happen when manipulation is done from one individual to the other. 

To give a brief overview of how this conversation is being addressed now. 

Here is a video off of Youtube:

     AMAZE Org Youtube channel does great in addressing issues of one-sided energy, and consent. Although, there is a brief introduction to manipulation or coercion by a partner. 

    Manipulative relationships follow a cycle: Tension, Violence, The "Honeymoon."

    When tension is built up within a relationship, the blame of one individual to the other is a red flag. This blame can be about the tension that was created or because the one partner had a bad day due to the tension. 

     

    From there, violence follows. The violence comes in all forms: physical, emotional, or sexual abuse. Most people are blinded by emotional abuse because it's not seen with one's eyes. A tactic often used by a manipulative person is the threat of leaving the other individual, the comments of attraction they get from others and their possibility of pursuit, and the dismissal of the other individual's feelings as valid. 

   The manipulative individual loves to turn every conversation into them and make the other partner feel bad for them. Usually, this leads to the manipulative person to blame their actions on outside factors or the way the other partner approaches these conversations in a healthy way. 

   Finally, the "honeymoon" follows to which they apologize and repeat they won't do it again. Overwhelmingly smother you with physical gifts or oral reassurance. 

Here is a diagram which summarizes everything I discussed: 

  I believe because these details of manipulative relationships are not in conversation often. It is common for people to find themselves in an unhealthy relationship without their acknowledgment. Some people don't even realize they are the manipulator in a relationship.

  We need to implement this conversation of healthy and non-healthy relationships at the same time sex education is taught to us. It will give individuals a better understanding of relationships and their own being. 

  Honestly, I can talk about the idea of relationships for hours and hours. 

  For the sake of my mind and the people who read my blog. I'll make it short. 

  Although, feel free to reach me through email, Instagram, or the comment section. 

  Let's talk about healthy relationships!