Jan. 23, 2018 | Happiness // Personal Growth Journal Entry #3

Self-help books have been a gateway to mind liberation for me these past few years to achieve tranquility. The likely outcome of inner peace these books claim and the elimination of harmful thinking and discouragement, encourage me to invest in these "non-FDA" approved books.

I pick up books which claim to resolve relationship issues and unhappiness because I strive to achieve some enlightenment in these categories.

Long awaited epiphanies that I as a 20-year-old or as my 40-year-old mind per say, feed off of and crave for in self-development.

I still find myself to possess the mental hardships going into reading these therapeutic books, however.

Take in mind; I read a book about "Latinas in love" which explicitly talks about the ways Latino culture can embed certain restrictions in relationships structures in individuals--romantic relationships.

The conservative thought process in Latino culture, the binary matrimony, reinforces the limitation of dating especially in women.

In Latinas in Love by Valerie Menard, the ordinary familial conversation of matrimony and binary roles is analyzed.

An analysis which blew me away as a recent broken-hearted girl at the brink of her late teens, years ago.

It encouraged me to reflect on the issues of emotional and mental damage that a break up had done to me then.

The culture, Latino culture, that had blinded me from the difference dating meant in the American culture versus the Mexican culture.

Yet, after connecting to the text and understanding the culture differences.

I still found myself confused and self-doubt began to possess me.

How was this book that pinpointed the idea of dating and the cultural influence done to bi-racial individuals not giving me a peace of mind?

It was the complete opposite.

I started to doubt my thoughts, and I got even far more upset with myself.

Now, recovering from a recent dark emotional whirl.

I picked up another self-help book titled The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking by Oliver Burkeman.

This book had appealed to me through my reading spree on Medium through this dark time of emotional turmoil and mental instability.

It had been mentioned in an article dealing with the idea of depression and the ways in coping with the mental state.

The recommended book seem to replicate the cliché of self-help books and the aesthetic of the "it will fix your problem at the end of 200 pages".

But it did the opposite.

The book that seem to display the idea of resolving unhappiness didn't do such thing; Rather than sweet talk the concept of solving depression, it spoke about the issues self-help books promise to buyers.

Of course, I became uncomfortable at the thought of how much money and time I had invested in self-help books. The illusion of having my problems solved with the investment being a dud.

Although, I evaluated the critic I had upon the binge reading of these promising books and concluded:

Self-reflection is key.

Buying books that claim to resolve your issues isn't the solution.

It can be part of it, but it depends mainly on the devotion you put into analyzing your thoughts and not being brainwashed into what a book claims to be telling you is the right way.

Being true to yourself and acknowledging the thoughts your mind surfaces in times of hardships is far valuable than buying self-help books.

Surrounding yourself with positive factors helps to create an environment of self-evaluation too.

I recently decided to adopt a cat because I wanted to fulfill the idea of "loneliness" that I realized was reoccurring stress for me.

Dwayne "the cat" Johnson (pictured above), has helped me control the emotional and mental influx that I had been dealing with a couple of months ago.

I'm glad to say that recovery is steady and very slow, but it's something that I'm okay with thankfully.

Yes, I wrote this lengthy post just to introduce my cat.

You're welcome.


Sources:

The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking by Oliver Burkeman

Latinas in Love: A Modern Guide to Love and Relationships by Valerie Menard